Only month and one day ago today, I posted this on my Facebook page. The election of President-Elect Trump was a devastating blow to my perception of my country and the world at large. We are entering a four-year period of uncertainty; but one thing we cannot deny is the wave of bigotry and hate the election of Donald Trump unleashed. I wrote this amid the chaos, but I believe it is still - and will continue to be - relevant, especially for the duration of Donald Trump's presidency. For this reason, I am reposting this in a more accessible medium.
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To all of my white/ straight/ able/ non-Muslim friends and family members, or any person who does not belong to one of the current target demographics:
In lieu of Donald Trump's election, there are some concepts I would like to discuss and some requests I'd like to make. They will not be easy to listen to, but I need you all to understand, they are not personal. If you want to help ease the tension prevalent in our country right now, please, take the time to read this post. I will discuss larger concepts, but I will also include a personal anecdote to drive them home.
I don't know which of you voted for Donald Trump. I know some of you did. I don't care about your personal politics. I'm not interested in your reasons behind voting for Donald Trump. In this post, I am concerned with the future. I have seen countless calls from Trump supporters and straight white folk to "come together" and "unify". I am interested in offering a way we can do this.
It is an absolutely irrefutable FACT that Donald Trump's rhetoric has unleashed a wave of racism, bigotry, and discrimination that has manifested in full-force following the election. Swastika graffiti, racial slurs painted across the property of minorities (homes, cars), threatening notes, people dressing in Black Face and wearing the Confederate Flag, and public harassment and violence towards minorities IS HAPPENING EVERYWHERE.
In addition to this, online arguments abound. I have noticed, in all of these instances, it is overwhelmingly the case that the targeted populations have been left to defend themselves.
Two days ago, someone on my friend, Kevin's, Facebook page asked me why Hillary was a "more moral choice" over Trump in response to my explanation of what makes Trump dangerous to minority populations. I asked the individual to send me a personal message if they wanted to have that conversation, because attempting to discuss Hillary's faults - without, at the very least, acknowledging the valid, logically presented, and empirically evidenced Trump issues I had addressed - is a form of redirection (meaning, she was attempting to excuse Trump's bigotry and prejudice by finding faults in his opponent). This tactic is - at the very least - problematic, because it minimizes and excuses Trump's morally unacceptable behavior.
In one of this person's attempted rebuttals, they said: "Id rather be stuck in a room with a racist than a murderer."
I responded with: "That's because you're white."
Kevin then responded to me: "and your racist."
I am not here to defend myself against this accusation. I'm not racist against anyone. (And for the record, you cannot be racist against white people. Look it up.)
I would, however, like to point something out to all of you. I considered myself white for most of my life, seeing as I was raised by white parents and my whole family is white (I was adopted). For my entire life, people - mostly classmates and strangers - have made it a point to tell me that I am NOT white. The fact of the matter is, I AM brown. But I am ALSO white. I sometimes pass as white, but most often I receive the, "What are you?" question in regards to my ethnic makeup. Because I have NEVER been allowed to just "be" white, I have finally chosen to identify as brown. But I digress.
My point: in this moment - as always happens in these situations - these people, instead of pausing to consider my comment, immediately "played the race card." Kevin - who called me racist - knows me "in real life," meaning he knows what I look like. We have NEVER discussed my self-image or ethnic background. He immediately DECIDED I WAS BROWN IN ORDER TO DISMISS MY COMMENT AS RACIST AGAINST WHITE PEOPLE.
When my comment actually meant that, for a person of color, a murderer and a racist might very well be the same thing, Kevin chose instead to assert that I was attacking white people.
The "conversation" ended in two white people calling me racist against white people in a number of different ways. No one stepped in.
So what's the point of all of this? What do these situations have in common? The harassment, the violence, the online bullying? WHITE PEOPLE, STRAIGHT PEOPLE, ABLE PEOPLE - PRIVILEGED PEOPLE, THOSE OF YOU WHO ARE SAFE IN YOUR OWN SKIN - YOU ARE NOT SAYING ANYTHING.
I have said all of this in order to address my final point:
It is not the work of ethnic minorities to explain discrimination to white people. It is not the work of the LGBTQ+ community to explain discrimination to straight people. It is not the work of the oppressed to explain privilege - white, male, straight, ablest, etc. - to those who have it. It is not our work to explain these things, because - when we try to - we are often silenced, attacked, and invalidated, as is exemplified above.
To those of you with privilege - is YOUR work to call out racism when you see it, to explain concepts like privilege to those with privilege when you understand these concepts, to not be a bystander when you witness harassment and discrimination. Yes, this includes online harassment.
If you consider yourself an "ally" to minority populations - be they colored, disabled, LGBTQ+, Muslim, etc. - the work of combating discrimination FALLS ON YOU. If you are someone who says things like, "I'm not racist," or "I would never," or "I don't mind gay people," and follows any of these statements with a "but," this work is on you.
If you are "disgusted" by the discrimination, prejudice, harassment and violence manifesting throughout our country, but you voted for the man who emboldened the "real" racists, white supremacists, and bigots to act, DEFENDING THE ATTACKED POPULATIONS IS ON YOU.
Privileged people are more likely to listen to those who share their privilege. When a colored person attempts to explain white privilege to a white person, the very real concept of white privilege becomes an "excuse" or an "attack"... something dismissible. This sucks a lot. This is the reality of it. This is something we ALL need to address.
To those of you with privilege - to white people, straight white people, able white people - it is YOUR job to stand up to those who attack minorities, on whatever front. It is YOUR job to BREAK THE SILENCE, to DEFEND those attacked for their mere existence, to CHANGE the rhetoric you and your privileged friends use.
I honestly believe most of the people who voted for Trump did not understand the seriousness of the repercussions the rest of us are now facing, and now, WE NEED YOUR HELP. WE NEED STRAIGHT/ WHITE/ ABLE/ CHRISTIAN PEOPLE TO STAND UP TO THE HATE. We cannot do it alone, and if you make us do it alone, it will only further divide us.
I am willing to fight these battles with you. Are you willing to fight them with me? Despite the discomfort? Where situations are uncomfortable for you, they might be deadly for me. They might be deadly for my friends, for your friends. People I love, people you love are in DANGER.
So please, spread this message. If not via Facebook, at least through discussion. Ideally through action. STAND UP FOR US. Stand up for the people you "didn't intend" to oppress by voting for Trump. Help us. Literally, help us.